Thursday, July 7, 2011

baton rouge

I was born and still live in New Jersey but somehow I feel like I was supposed to be a southern bell.

My Boyfriend Tim is from Louisiana. I've been there only a handful of times but somehow I know its where I'm supposed to be. Every time I've been there I've enjoyed my time there so much that my heart literally aches when I have to leave. As pathetic as it sounds I cry like a baby when we leave.

There's something about the dew on the leaves in the morning. There's something about the smell in the air during the late afternoon. There's just something about the people, the family that I have there. I love every single little thing in that great state. The first time I was there I knew it and the last time I was there I knew it again. It's my home. I look forward to going there to see my family... to smell that air, to see the flat crisp land that I love so much. When we fly down I get goosebumps in the plane when they tell us we've arrived.

I die for the food, the atmosphere. I love the fall there the most. The smell of Football is in the air. Comfort food and cold beer surrounded by great friends and family is a must every weekend...every day.

I love everything about the time I spend there. I cherish every day I've spend there. I love waking up early...smelling fresh baked Blueberry Muffins made by my favorite Future Mother in Law. I can't get enough of the lazy days I spend just relaxing. I love heading over to my Future Sister in Law's house eating delicious food made by my Future Brother in Law and just relaxing by the couch watching football. I dream of trips with them to New Orleans. Nothing else compares. I love them. I love them all.

I'll always remember the first time I met all of them. I met My Future Father in Law first. And I loved him. I was so nervous. But they all made me feel like I was welcome and part of the family/ friend circle. I didn't feel like I was a new girl in Tim's life. I felt like I was welcome and that I knew them forever. That is something I never experienced in New Jersey. And I forever thank them for that.

I can't begin to try and explain the way I feel when I think about Louisiana. I love absolutley everything about it. Is it cheesey that I daydream about how my life would be if I lived there? Maybe. But this is how I am.

One thing I learned the first time I went there is what life is all about....

It's not about how much money you have or how big your house is. It's not about how high of a college degree you have. It's about enjoying your life and making the most of what GOD has given you. It's about being greatful and never taking for granted the blessings you have. WHO CARES if you shop at Walmart instead of Bloomingdales or Nordstroms. Honestly WHO CARES!?

After being together 7 years it still boggles my mind how such a amazing man would leave such a wonderful place to be with me. I will never belive it. I pinch myself nearly every day. After this crazy whilwind of a relationship Tim and I have been thru I still can't belive that this is my life. It is truly a fairy tale

I might be a dork but every night before I go to bed I pray that someday our life will lead us back to Baton Rouge... and that our kids will be able to be from such a wonderful place.

I would love nothing more than letting my future children spend an entire day with any of those amazing people. This is a shoutout to all of them. You know who you are. I love all of you unconditonally, thank you for always making me feel welcome and loved. I would do anything to be there making memories with you all right now. Please know you guys are the best. I can't wait to someday actually be able to call you my family. I am so lucky. God is great!

People always say "home is where the heart is" roots might lead me back to New Jersey, I might rock a poof and go "down the shore" instead of going to the beach...but i'm a S o u t h e r n G i r l at heart.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Deal with it.

I guess some times you just have to. It sucks and its not fair but you will drive yourself NUTS if all you do is complain about what someone else is or isn't doing. Work is just that it's work. But work is also what you make it. If you walk around all day with a puss on your face and a stank attitude its going to bring you and your team crumbling down. That's what I have been doing the past few months. Bringing myself down. I'm not crumbled yet, so I'm going to start rebuilding before its too late.

Sunday, January 9, 2011

hello 2011.

New Years resolutions never really work for me. I always say i'm going on a diet and then give up. This year I have decided to go down a different road. Instead of going on a diet I have decided to simply e n j o y m y l i f e.

There are so many things I have in my life right now to be thankful for, but the past year I have focused too much on the negative things.

This year will be different for me.
Every time I find myself feeling overwhelmed, stressed, frustrated, or down I'm going to take a moment to breathe deep, take in whats around me and all the wonderful things I have to be thankful for in my life.
No more selfishness, hostility, anger, or jealousy.

I might be a week late and while most people have already wasted the gym membership they bought...

I'm going to
e n j o y m y l i f e. ♥

Monday, September 13, 2010

World's Best

My Grandfather passed away early Sunday morning. He is at peace now and resting in heaven with my Grandma. I will miss him more than words can describe, the void that will be left in my heart cant be replaced.

As you grow up so many different things happen and so many things change. You learn about yourself and others. You do things you regret and you regret things you didn't do.

What happens when you regret something you didn't do? Should you sit back and feel sorry yourself? Should you be forever angry with yourself and hold it over your head each day? Well, I cant really say I know the answer to any of those questions. The only thing I DO know is that for a while I'm going to probably feel those things. My grandfather was a very important part of my life. But you know what? Sometimes you don't always share how important someone is with anyone and sometimes you stay a little further away then you should or wanted to. Not because you don't care to see them, not because you don't have the time, but because you love them so much that its too hard to see them sick. Unfortunately that's the time when the one who is sick needs you most. My grandfather has been in/out of the hospital since Thanksgiving 2009, and I never went to see him. You see I had been nervous to go because I knew he was sick and I knew he probably didn't look good. Every time I said I was going to go, something got in the way. But I surely thought of him everyday. And I was always asking my other family members how he was doing. In July I was going to go see him but I got mono. On Saturday this week I decided I was seriously going to go Sunday afternoon...but I didn't have a chance, because he passed around 1:45am. I know I can't take it back. I know he didn't know how I felt and how much I thought of him. But there is some part of me that seems to think it was fate that I didn't get to go. Call me crazy if you will. I believe that everything happens for a reason, maybe I was supposed to remember him like I do. A happy, funny, wonderful man who I will always call my Poppy. We went to the nursing home after he had passed and the nurses were all crying. He was loved by so many people. Tell told us stories of how happy he had been because he had been winning at Bingo this week and all the ladies wanted to sit next to him. They told us that he was SO happy they had found his favorite shirt that was missing. He was sweet. He was funny. He was my Poppy. He didn't show his emotions very much, but every time he told me he loved me back will echo through my mind now and forever.

I love you Poppy with all my heart. I am forever sorry that I wasn't able to see you in the past months. Please know that I thought of you every day and you were (and will be) always in my heart. I should have seen you and held your hand in the hospital while you were sick, But I didn't. Please forgive me. Please know I love you. I will miss you so much. Give Grandma a BIG hug for me. I love you I love you I love you. Thank you for being the WORLD'S BEST POPPY.

Saturday, December 5, 2009

Sucky Day

Today started out like every other Saturday that I have to work, with me in a less than chipper mood.

So I got ready did my hair super cute, even put on one of my favorite shirts attempting to put myself in a better mood. Before I left my house I took Max out for his morning walk. As soon as a stepped outside I saw the greyish winter looking sky and could smell the snow in the air. Awsome.

I had to be there at 11am so I left my house at 10 to give myself,
a. enough time to get there.
b.enough time to stop and get gas.
c. enough time to stop and get a nice vanilla chai. (attempt #3 at a better mood)

Anywho, I got in my car and put in MxPx's new Christmas Album. (attempt #4 at a better mood). So I took my usual route to work. Took me about 15 mintues to get to RT. 17. Well that's where things got worse...The entrance ramp was closed. Not only that but there was no other way I could go because they had the other side of the road I came from closed. I had to go straight (and completley out of my way) and so did everyone else. Ugh. I sat through the traffic singing along to songs and playing on my iphone trying to not drive myself crazy (attempt #5). That's until I realized I had no gas left. I tried to escape the traffic...who knew there were so many dead ends on one road. It took me, no joke, 45 mintues to get from the closed entrance ramp to practically my house again. Finally I was able to get gas. (It was 11am now and I was late for work, and I HATE being late and I HATE people that are late.) I pulled into the gas station and lucklily enough for me there is a Dunkin Donuts in at this gas station. So as they were filling me up I ran in real quick to Dukin Donuts. Opps.. quick... did I say quick? Haha. Yeah right. Did you know that it takes exactly 5 mintues to put cream cheese on a bagel? And another 5 mintues to make a Vanilla Chai?? UGHH!

Ok so I finally get back to my car and head of to work. Once I get there I had to drive around in circles for a parking spot. I got so fed up with waiting I ended up parking in a spot about 983892 miles from the mall.

After being at work for maybe and hour I get 2 wonderful news flashes.

1. It's snowing.
2. Someone from Twilight is coming to the mall.

Cool. I expected the mall to get crazy busy because of this Twilight guy, but it didn't because the snow was getting worse. Cooler!

Well I ended up leaving work at 5 instead of 8 because I knew it would take me forever to get home. Then I had to walk to my car which was 983892 miles from the mall in the slushy snow and ruined my Uggs.

I was right I didn't get home until 6:45. I put the day's drama to rest and started decorating for christmas.

I tested all my lights and everything worked! I put the tree up and put the lights on. I had 2 sets on and only 1 to go. I plugged the third set into the ones that were already on the tree and it somehow blew out the rest of the lights.

So now my tree is sitting in my living room with lights that don't work, I'm sitting on the couch with a nice stiff drink.

Monday, September 7, 2009

labor day.

I don't really like all theses summer holidays too much. memorial day, 4th of july, labor day. Maybe it's because i'm always stuck at work.

I get upset that on these holidays all you see on tv and hear on the radio is people talking about being off from work, relaxing. For that matter you hear these things every Friday too. "It's almost the've made it!". It really get me! People don't realize that they have off from work and they get to relax but that's not the case with everyone. I think the public needs to be more sympathetic to the people working so that everyone else can enjoy the holiday. I've only gotten to enjoy one of these holidays this year, and it's not right.

What do people do on the weekends...or these holidays I stated above? Go shopping.
Who works at these stores on the holidays/weekends, me and millions of other people.

I think that if everyone isn't off from work it's not a holiday.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

day off.

You tend to take advantage of the simple things in life. Subconsciously those simple things play a big part in your sanity. You might not realize it but without some of the simple everyday or weekly things you do your life gets thrown off track. For instance, on my day off I don't normally relax, most of the time I spend that day catching up on things I haven't been able to do during my work days. Such as laundry, food shopping..etc. But I enjoy being able to do those things.

These past few weeks at work have been crazy. I feel like I haven't been able to do anything for myself. Today is my 11Th day in a row working, and I can't explain how happy I am to have tomorrow off. Just get back on my regular routine.

Walk my dog, bake cupcakes, manicure and pedicure. I'm excited to do the normal things that I take advantage of.

Laundry, cleaning my house, food shopping....i'm even excited to do the things I normally do not look forward to doing.